Let the night shift commence!!

Havn't blogged in ages... such is my super dull life...

However, here I am, yet again, working yet ANOTHER night shift with yet more wankery guests calling down with ridiculous requests!!

First Phone Call...

Me: "Welcome to Front Office, S speaking, how can I help?"
Guest: "I've just been down in your bar, and I was told that you don't have a residents bar?"
Me: "That's correct, as the bar is not strictly a hotel bar, it trades under public law, which, in Northern Ireland means that it closes at 1am"
Guest: "Oh, well you have different laws here than we do in England"
Me: "Yes, we do..."
Guest: "So what do I do if I want a drink at this time of the morning then?"
Me: "Well.... as I said, all of the public bars in Belfast close at 1am, so unless you have alcohol with you, I'm afraid I don't know where you would find a drink at this time of the morning..."
Guest: "What about a residents bar?"
Me: "Well you'd have to be resident of the hotel in order to use the bar"
Guest: "But I am a resident......"
Me: "Yes, but as the bar staff and I have explained, we don't have a residents bar"
Guest: "So you won't find me a drink now?"
Me: "Unfortunately, as I have explained, off licences close at 11 and public bars close at 1am"
Guest: "Right, ok then..."
Me: "Very sorry about that..."
Guest: "It's fine... I just won't stay here again then..."
Me: "No Problem.... " :D

Like... come on... are you really that desperate for a drink!? Jeez!!

Second Caller...

Me: "Welcome to Front Office, S speaking, How Can I help?"
Guest: "We've just tried to use the vending machine on the third floor and it's not accepting our money...."
Me: "Oh I'm very sorry about that, unfortunately the machines are not owned or regulated by the hotel, so I am unable to fix the machine, has it returned the coins?"
Guest: "Well... yes, but I want coke... can you go to the shop and get us some?"
Me: "No, unfortunately I am unable to do that, however there are other vending machines located in the same place on each of the floors..."
Guest: "Well we don't want to go and get it now, go you and get it and bring it to my room"
Me: "Unfortunately I am unable to do that for you as I am by myself at the moment"
Guest: "Well then how are we supposed to get our cokes?"
Me: "As I have explained, there are vending machines located on each of the floors, I'm afraid at 2am in the morning, that is all I am able to advise of..."
Guest: "Will we be safe enough to go to one of the other floors?"
Me: "Yes, I'm sure you will be fine... non-guests are not allowed into the hotel after 11pm and all of the corridors are monitored by CCTV..."
Guest: "Fine...."
** Guest hangs up**

Seriously... have you ever heard the likes of it? Obviously I have some serious alcoholics and insomniacs staying in the hotel this week as they just won't go to bed and keep coming downstairs and going for a smoke, I feel like I'm babysitting a bunch of big alcoholic, chain smoking babies!

Alas, enough of rant...

Till next time...

Sx